Chapter 6: Writing an Effective Introduction — CampusJourn
Chapter 6
Writing an Effective Introduction
Your title got someone to stop. Now your first sentence has to make them stay. This chapter teaches you exactly how to write P1 and P2 — the hook and the problem paragraph.
🎯Chapter Objective: By the end of this chapter, you will be able to write P1 and P2 of your column — a hook sentence and a problem paragraph — using a step-by-step method.
📖 Introduction
Last Time, You Wrote a Title. Now You Write the First Words Your Reader Actually Reads.
Last chapter, you learned how to write a title that makes someone stop and look.
Now they're looking. They clicked. They stepped closer to the bulletin board.
And they read your first sentence.
If that sentence is flat — they leave.
This chapter teaches you exactly how to write that first sentence. And the paragraph that follows it.
Not just what they should look like. How to actually write them.
📋 Section 1
Start With What You Know
Before you write a single word of your column, open your outline. Find two things: your stand — the one sentence that says exactly what you think should change — and your "who is affected" note — the specific group of people experiencing the problem. Those two things are the raw material for your introduction. You don't need to think of anything new. Everything you need is already in your outline.
StandThe school canteen should open a second serving window during the 30-minute lunch break.
WhoAbout 200 afternoon-class students who arrive at the canteen last and find the food already sold out.
Keep those two lines in front of you. You'll use them in the next two steps.
📌 The Rule
P1 — One sentence that makes the reader stop. Specific. Striking. Real. P2 — One to two sentences that explain what's happening. Ends with your stand.
🪝 Section 2
How to Write P1 — The Hook
Here is the step-by-step method for writing your hook.
Step 1Look at your "who is affected" line: "About 200 afternoon-class students who arrive at the canteen last and find the food already sold out."
Step 2Ask — what is the most specific, most real moment in this situation? Not the general problem. The exact moment when the problem hits someone.
Step 3Write that moment in one sentence. Use a specific detail — a time, a number, a place, a name. "By 12:10 PM, the canteen rice window at Mabuhay Elementary is already closed — and second recess hasn't even started yet."
That's your hook. One sentence. One real, specific moment. The reader can picture it immediately.
Three Hook Types
There are three ways to write a hook. Pick the one that fits your topic best.
Type 1
The Fact Hook
Use when you have a striking number or contrast. Start with the most striking number — put the consequence right after it.
"There are about 600 students at Mabuhay Elementary. Only two canteen windows are open during the 30-minute lunch break." — 600 vs 2. The reader feels the problem immediately.
Type 2
The Question Hook
Use when you want the reader to put themselves inside the problem. Turn the most frustrating moment into a question they can answer from their own experience.
"Have you ever waited 15 minutes in the canteen line — and then watched the food run out right before your turn?" Readers think: yes, that happened to me.
Type 3
The Bold Statement Hook
Use when your topic is serious and your stand is very clear. State the most direct, most uncomfortable truth. Don't soften it. Don't hedge.
"Every school day, about 200 students at Mabuhay Elementary go through the lunch break with little or nothing to eat — because the canteen runs out of food before they even get there."
Three Questions to Check Your Hook
Check 1Is there a specific detail in it? A number, a time, a place, a name. If no — add one.
Check 2Does it show a real moment — not just a general complaint? "The canteen is crowded" is general. "By 12:10 PM, the canteen rice window is already closed" is a real moment.
Check 3Does it make you want to know what happens next? Read it out loud. If you wouldn't keep reading — rewrite it.
If all three answers are yes — your hook is ready. Move to P2.
📝 Section 3
How to Write P2 — The Problem
P2 has two jobs: explain the problem, and end with your stand. Here is the step-by-step method.
Step 1Start with "who is affected" from your outline: "About 200 afternoon-class students who arrive at the canteen last."
Step 2Write one sentence that shows what actually happens to them. Not what might happen — what does happen: "About 200 students from the afternoon classes arrive at the canteen last — and on most days, the rice and viand are already sold out by the time they get there."
Step 3Write one sentence showing what those students do instead: "They are left choosing between a few snacks or going hungry until dismissal."
Step 4End with your stand: "The school canteen should open a second serving window so that every student gets the chance to eat a proper meal."
Put it together: "About 200 students from the afternoon classes arrive at the canteen last — and on most days, the rice and viand are already sold out by the time they get there. They are left choosing between a few snacks or going hungry until dismissal. The school canteen should open a second serving window so that every student gets the chance to eat a proper meal."
Three sentences. The problem. The consequence. The stand. Done.
The One Mistake to Avoid in P2
The most common P2 mistake is explaining too much. Students write four, five, six sentences — covering the problem, its history, who is responsible, possible solutions, their feelings. That's the whole column squeezed into one paragraph. P2 has two jobs only: show who is affected and what is happening to them, then state your stand. When those two jobs are done — stop. Move to P3.
💡
P2 must always end with your stand. A reader who finishes P2 knowing your stand will read P3 with a clear question: "Is this reason convincing?" That's exactly the kind of engaged reader you want.
🔗 Section 4
Weak vs Strong Opening
❌ Weak Opening
P1: "Hello. My name is James and I am a Grade 5 student. In this column, I will be talking about the school canteen."
P2: "The school canteen is a place where students buy food. Food is important. I think the canteen should be improved. There are many reasons for this which I will explain."
P1 introduces the writer — not the problem.
P2 explains what a canteen is — readers already know.
"Should be improved" — improved how? Too vague.
"I will explain" — don't announce. Just do it.
✅ Strong Opening
P1: "By 12:10 PM, the canteen rice window at Mabuhay Elementary is already closed — and second recess hasn't even started yet."
P2: "About 200 students from the afternoon classes arrive at the canteen last and find the food already sold out. They are left with a few snacks or nothing at all. The school canteen should open a second serving window so that every student gets the chance to eat a proper meal."
P1 is one specific, real moment — not an intro to the writer.
P2 names exactly who is affected and what happens to them.
The stand is specific — second window, every student eats.
No wasted sentences. Just the problem and the position.
Remember the Formula
Who is affected?→Most real moment→P1 Hook
Who + what happens→What they go without→Stand → P2
P2 must always end with your stand. State it clearly. Every time.
✏️ Practice Time
Apply what you learned. Work through the activities below step by step.
1
Write the Hook
Each item gives you an outline note. Use the method from Section 2 to write one hook sentence — then tap to check.
📋Read the outline note for each item. Write your hook sentence — then tap Reveal Sample to compare yours to the sample and the explanation.
Samples revealed:
Hook Item 1
Who is affected: Students who walk home through Gate 2 after 5 PM dismissal — about 80 students daily. Key detail: The streetlight near Gate 2 has been broken for three weeks.
✅
Sample Hook:
Hook Item 2
Who is affected: All 600 students, especially Grade 5 and 6 students who need reference books for research. Key detail: The library is only open on Tuesdays and Thursdays.
✅
Sample Hook:
Hook Item 3
Who is affected: Grade 5 students who receive homework on Fridays — about 120 students. Key detail: On average, four homework assignments are given every Friday.
✅
Sample Hook:
2
Write Your P1 and P2
Use your outline from Chapter 4 — or choose a topic below. Follow the method step by step.
📝Copy your stand and "who is affected" from your outline. Then write P1 and P2 one step at a time.
📎 Sample (to guide you)
✅ Sample
My stand:The school canteen should open a second serving window during the 30-minute lunch break.
Who is affected:About 200 afternoon-class students who arrive at the canteen last and find the food already sold out.
P1 Hook:By 12:10 PM, the canteen rice window at Mabuhay Elementary is already closed — and second recess hasn't even started yet.
P2:About 200 students from the afternoon classes arrive at the canteen last and find the food already sold out. They are left with a few snacks or nothing at all. The school canteen should open a second serving window so that every student gets the chance to eat a proper meal.
🗒️ My Turn
🔍 Self-Check Guide
What to Check
Done ✅
Try Again 🔄
P1 is exactly one sentence
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P1 has a specific detail — number, time, place, or name
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P1 shows a real moment — not just a general complaint
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P2 explains who is affected and what happens to them
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P2 ends with my stand
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P2 is two to three sentences — nothing longer
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P1 and P2 feel connected — one leads naturally into the other
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📊 Simple Rubric
✅✅
P1 specific + P2 problem + stand at the end — strong opening. You are ready to write P3.
✅
P1 written but vague — go back to Step 2. Add one number, time, or real detail. Or P2 written but no stand at the end — add your stand as the last sentence.
✏️
Neither complete — go back to Step 1. Start with just one sentence — your hook.
Answers will differ for each student. Use the rubric above or ask your teacher for help.
🧠 Fix the Opening
Each weak opening below has a problem. Choose the option that correctly names it and fixes it.
0/4
Score
Question 1 of 4
QUESTION 1 OF 4
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out of 4
Score Guide
4 / 4
You can fix a weak opening and write a strong one. 🗞️
3 / 4
Almost there. Go back and see what gave the one you missed away.
2 / 4
Re-read Section 4.2. Compare the weak and strong examples line by line.
0–1 / 4
Go back to the method in Sections 2 and 3. Try the steps one at a time.
Up Next
Chapter 7: Supporting Your Opinion
You now know how to write P1 and P2 — a hook that grabs the reader and a problem paragraph that ends with your stand. Next, you'll prove your point with reasons and evidence in P3 through P6.